It was just last year in 2016 that I discovered the call on my life. It’s something still really new to me, but something I am super excited to share with everyone. I’ve been on and off involved with my church for the past 7 years. Over the course of the 7 years, I would get really into attending church and then life would happen and I would stop going. It was a vicious cycle that was hard to break. I was struggling and I wasn’t connected with anyone at church, which made it hard to stay accountable.
In 2013, I decided to get more involved with the church by attending my first sisterhood group. I needed this group because I wanted to be connected with other christian women. In 2014, I began serving at sisterhood because I believed in the groups so much. That same year, I became a co-leader and helped to lead a group of woman at the church. I also started and led a bible study with a few close friends. I longed to be connected and to belong and my hope was for the women I led to to feel the same.
After helping to lead that semester, life started happening and I started feeling like I wasn’t really making a difference. Things were changing at the church and I slowly strayed away from the group and from church in general. Towards the end of 2016, I began searching for another small group to get involved with. I knew it was important to connect with people for accountability. However, every group I looked up just didn’t feel right. It’s funny how God works because around this same time I received a message on Facebook from someone I met at sisterhood in 2014. She was starting a group study on a book called Present over Perfect. At that time in my life, it was exactly what I was looking for.
It took me a while to open up, but eventually I started getting more involved with their church, praying more and reading my bible more. One night in early 2016, my husband and I were walking around the neighborhood and I told him I felt like God was calling me to lead women. There wasn’t really a defining moment that it happened. It’s just this overwhelming sense I got inside of me over the course of a few months. The closer I got to God, the harder it was to be happy with what I was doing in my career. I just knew there was more to life than a 9-5 job. I had this fire ignited inside of me and I wanted more.
After talking with my husband about this, the very next day the girl who invited me to that small group met with me to ask me to lead the women of their small church. She was in prayer and God put me on her heart. She had no idea that I had literally just voiced that I wanted to be leading women to my husband. Coincidence? I think not! It was God preparing the way.
I was super excited, but also very nervous and had doubts about myself. Some thoughts I had at the time included:
- Why me
- I’m an introvert and could never be a leader
- I’m not good enough
The list could go on and on. My whole life I’ve been a people pleaser, but I knew I had to say yes. It’s like I said in my post about tithing; God will give you the opportunities, but it’s up to you to act on them. I was being obedient to my call by saying yes. I knew if I could do this, God would provide me the courage and confidence. He called me and I had faith that he would support me. During this season with this church, I learned so much about myself.
There were a lot of firsts that happened at this church. For me, 2016 was a year of spiritual growth and understanding my identity in Christ.
This period of growth was not easy and was uncomfortable at times. I knew I needed to say yes, but there were times I didn’t want to. However, there was something inside of me that just said to keep going. I know that growth comes from being uncomfortable and no one ever grows by staying in their comfort zone.
Right now I don’t know what the future holds. I know that my calling to lead and help women has been revealed to me, but honestly I don’t know to what extent. I can’t say that I have all the answers, but I can say that if you put your trust and faith in God, He will prepare the way for you.
The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.
As I write this, I’m thinking about what’s in store for 2018. This has been an uncomfortable season for me because I’ve had to say no to an amazing career opportunity. I’ve started voicing my call to ministry to people and it’s becoming real. My goal is to live a more purposeful life and for me that means helping people. What does that look like for you?
God desires to reveal your calling to you. If you still are unsure of what your calling is in life, talk to God and ask Him to reveal it to you. When God revealed my calling to me, it wasn’t through an audible voice. It was through church podcasts, serving and reading my bible. I encourage you to start tuning in to the world around you. Listen and look for little signs from God and remember this verse from Deuteronomy 31:8 “The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”